Self-esteem comes from being able to define the world in your own terms and refusing to abide by the judgment of others.

Oprah Winfrey

It’s Boost Your Self Esteem month, which is a fabulous cause dedicated to improving self-esteem among people of all cultures, races, ethnicities, age groups and social statuses. Self-esteem (AKA the way you feel about yourself) begins developing in your early childhood but can ebb and flow constantly throughout your life – especially when you’re dealing with stress, trauma, and good ol’ mental health issues. Boosting your self-esteem is paramount for fighting depression and anxiety and conquering all of your goals. And the good news is that you have the power to develop your self-esteem, even when you’re feeling your lowest. That’s why we’re sharing some of our favorite, totally uncomplicated tips that are guaranteed to help you feel better about yourself, no matter what mood you’re in.

1. Go outside

Whether the forecast is rain, snow, humidity, or perfection, spending just a few minutes outside will change your physical and mental perspective and help you feel instantly recharged. Not to mention, spending any amount of time in the great outdoors (forest, city, beach, or otherwise) comes with a variety of health benefits. You can take a walk, rest in the sunshine, simply sit down and enjoy the scenery, or do any activity (or non-activity) that allows you to get some fresh air and a little Vitamin D.
tall grass

2. Just buy it, already

No need to pretend, we know you have an online shopping cart full of things you want for yourself but can’t seem to justify. Of course, we’re not suggesting that you skip paying your rent to snag that cute new handbag you’ve been eying, but we are here to remind you that you are completely worthy of the things you want, even if they seem expensive and “frivolous.” If there’s something you want to buy that you’ve been thinking about for a while, it’s probably worth the investment – whether it’s a sexy new outfit, a spa day, or the latest gadget. You do not have to deprive yourself of the things you want most in life for any reason.

3. Exercise-ish

It’s no secret that exercising is good for your body and mind in a variety of ways, but you don’t have to sweat on a treadmill for hours to get the benefit of a self-esteem boost. Take a 10 minute walk outside, dance around your home or office to your favorite song, or set a one-minute timer and do planks on the floor. The result will be a burst of endorphins, a positive change in your mindset, and pride in yourself for prioritizing a healthy activity.
boudoir dancing

4. Head to the Silk & Lace Boudoir Facebook Group

There’s nothing like a little sisterhood and positivity to put you in the right frame of mind and make you feel better about yourself. And the Silk & Lace Facebook Group is full of both. Scroll through the hundreds of uplifting posts, drop a note to introduce yourself, or ask for advice on just about any issue you’re dealing with. The more than 1.6K women who make up this private group are strong, inspiring, relatable, and pass zero judgment. They’re a great resource for positivity and a guaranteed way to feel better about yourself, fast.

Silk and Lace Facebook Group

5. Play some upbeat music

It’s no secret that music is a powerful art form. It has the ability to inspire, empower, and move you – both physically and emotionally. And when your favorite jam comes on, it has the power to put you in the right mood and mindset, immediately. That’s why music is a very important part of the process at Silk & Lace Boudoir. (In case you didn’t know, each one of our clients receives a customized playlist to help her feel motivated, inspired, and at ease during her photo shoot). So grab your earbuds, hit play on your favorite song, and live in the moment – you’ll feel better, instantly, no matter what kind of mood you were in to begin with. Need some song suggestions? Check out our ultimate boudoir playlist featuring confident & empowering Black female voices.

6. Spend some time on social media

Okay, so we know this is usually the opposite of what people tell you when you’re not feeling so great about yourself, but we disagree (kind of). Though it’s true that social media is full of overly smiley, unattainable, extra-edited versions of people’s lives, it’s also full of amazing content that can uplift and entertain you. Instead of scrolling through your regular feed, hit search and hunt for things that make you happy, e.g., #kittens, #positivity, #fashion, etc. You can also visit our Instagram page for some beautiful pictures of real women celebrating their bodies and owning their confidence.

Silk and Lace Boudoir Social Media

7. Make a quick list of what you like about yourself

Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and spend a few moments thinking about yourself. It’s possible that negative thoughts will reveal themselves first, but let those ideas come and go and try to redirect your thoughts to your best qualities. Maybe you’re a great friend, a hard worker, or a caring mother. Maybe you have fabulous hair, a great sense of style, or a rockin’ booty (hey girl, haaaay!). The point here is that you have a lot of wonderful assets, and with this mental exercise, anything goes! Simply transferring positive thoughts about yourself from your head to a piece of paper that you can read over and over again will help you visualize and reinforce those ideas so you can feel better about yourself, instantly. It doesn’t matter if your completed list has three things on it or 300 things – what does matter is that you can recognize the power of your own positive thoughts.

8. Give a compliment to someone else

While you’re making a list of the things you like about yourself, your mind will probably drift to qualities you admire in your friends, family, and others around you. Tell them so! Pick someone you care about, or even a random stranger, and throw a sincere compliment their way. Send your bestie an unsolicited text to remind her how important she is to you or tell the woman standing next to you in the grocery store how much you like her shoes. A little compliment goes a long way. And when you see someone else smile because of something you said, you’ll feel like a million bucks!

9. Make a list of things you want to do but haven’t done yet

Everyone has a bucket list, even if it’s just a mental one. And if you don’t intentionally make time to check those things off your list, you’ll miss out on some really great opportunities to add more purpose and fun to your life. Maybe you’ve been wanting to try indoor rock climbing, plan an exotic vacation, learn a new language, or schedule a one-of-a-kind boudoir shoot *hint hint*. Whatever your dreams are, we encourage you to make a quick list of all of them and manifest your best life! Knowing that you have these amazing desires inside of you will show you how interesting, fun, and adventurous you really are! And, if you’re feeling extra froggy, we dare you to open your calendar app and actually schedule time to explore some of the activities and interests on your list! We promise you won’t regret it.

Silk and Lace Boudoir Getaway
Want more self-esteem boosting tips? Head to our post from last year, 5 Ways to Boost Your Self Esteem Instantly.