How One Nurse Used Boudoir to Become a Queen

It’s no secret that it takes an incredible person to become a nurse. Nurses put their own health (both physical and mental) to the side so others may thrive. That takes honor. That takes integrity. And that takes complete selflessness. But because of their nurturing personality, nurses often struggle with taking the time they need for themselves.

That’s why we get so excited when we see a nurse in the studio. These women are strong, fearless, and stunning in so many ways. And every nurse deserves a crown for the incredible things they do to care for complete strangers. But, as every royalty story goes, crowns aren’t given, they’re taken. And that’s why we’re honored to celebrate Nurses Week by telling Selena’s story. 

Selena is a badass, dedicated wife, former competitive dancer, and DC-area super nurse who’s spent more than a decade committing her life to the service of others. And oh yeah, she wore a crown during her ultra sexy, crazy fun photo shoot so that she would always have proof of a special moment in time where she truly recognized herself as a queen.

But, before her royal boudoir session, Selena was a woman who found herself struggling with the concepts of self-care and self-love. Like many women in our society, she and her body had endured a challenging relationship since childhood.

“I danced all through my elementary school and high school and I ended up stopping in college because the experiences I had were kind of rough,” Selena said. “I was in a really competitive dance company; we had a downtown program that partnered with the Pennsylvania Ballet and everything. It was really high stakes all the time. And I mean, different from what I see today with young girls going into dance. When I was there, the dance competition world was body-image focused. If you ever watched the movie Center Stage, that was how hardcore our place was. So it really did a lot of damage to how I perceived myself, and how comfortable I perceived myself, and how comfortable I felt in my body. Even though I was a size two at that point, I still felt like I was the biggest person in the world. It was crazy.”

The unrealistic and unhealthy standards set by Selena’s dance company forced her to leave the competitive dance world behind her.

Selena focused on completing her education and becoming a nurse. During that time, she also met a wonderful, supportive man who became her husband. But just a few short years later, she found herself, like many hardworking women, spending most of her time at work feeling unappreciated and overwhelmed.

“Work was just out of control, crazy. I felt like I was drowning every day,” said Selena. “I really lost more and more focus with myself. And my body image got worse, because I had gained all this weight really rapidly. And I was stressing out about that.”

Selena was burnt out, physically and emotionally. It was time to make a change for the better.

“I needed to accept myself and feel comfortable and just live in the now,” she said.

Selena had been looking for healthier ways to cope with her emotions and body image, like going to therapy, keeping an affirmation journal, and meditating with positivity-reinforcing chants. She drew strength from her incredibly-supportive husband and friends and also stumbled across Silk & Lace Boudoir’s Facebook group.

“I’ve been following Silk & Lace for the past two years,” Selena said. “And it’s been refreshing and has helped me knock down that wall of not being comfortable with myself. Seeing other women’s’ stories, where they’ve come from, their hardships. Seeing women that look like me, even though it never really clicked, that like, ‘oh, that’s me.’ I slowly started being more comfortable with myself and appreciating how I look. And it was also years of therapy to get me to this level, too. Just building more confidence and self-esteem.”

Eventually, Selena had built enough confidence to buy a crown, which, to her, symbolized a huge step in her recovery from low self-esteem, and gave her a feeling more valuable than the Crown Jewels.

“I was shopping with some friends,” Selena said. “We went into this one shop in Old Town and they had these great corsets. I really wanted a corset, but then I saw this crown and I was like, “I REALLY like this crown.” But I was on the fence about buying it.

At that time, Selena’s lack of confidence made her leave the store empty handed. When she went home, she told her husband about the crown and the feeling of empowerment it had given her. He was shocked that she didn’t buy it and encouraged her to go back. Feeling reassured but still a bit silly, Selena returned to the store she’d visited previously with her friends and finally bought the crown.

“I was like, alright, if I buy this crown, I’m going to schedule a boudoir shoot someday,” Selena said. “I don’t know when, but I’m going to do this, this crown will power me to do this.”

For two years, the crown sat on a shelf collecting dust… until one day, Selena saw a special and very rare flash sale announcement on Silk & Lace Boudoir’s Facebook page. She jumped on the opportunity immediately.

“I told all my girlfriends and they were so excited!” Selena recalled. “And one who was with me two years ago asked if I was going to wear the crown. I told her, ‘Absolutely I’m bringing the crown! Even if I don’t wear it, it’s going to be in the room. It’s going to sit there somewhere, so I can stare at that crown. Because that’s going to be my driving force.’”

And it was. Just look at her dazzling photos.

“I’m a nurse,” Selena said. “That’s pretty much been my identity – doing a lot of things for and helping a lot of other people. One thing I’ve always struggled with is doing things for myself and being okay with doing something for myself. And it was just such an empowering feeling. Like, this is my decision, this is my choice. And this is for me. People get to enjoy the ripple effects afterwards. But this was mainly just for me. Part of me just felt so at peace too, weirdly in a way, like I soothed some inner part of my soul I didn’t know really needed this. Even before I saw the pictures, I put my crown on. And I could feel it. I felt like a queen, and I owned it. And that’s how I’m going to tackle stuff in my life.”

“Even after I signed up, I had a lot of fears and hesitations,” Selena said. “A lot of it was those old fears of my body image. Like, ‘Can I pull this off? Will my photos look good? What if, for some reason, they all turn out bad and I don’t see the person I really feel like I am reflected in the pictures.’ But after talking with [the Silk & Lace team], I just felt so welcomed and comfortable. It helped put that little voice in the back of my head and helped calm that voice. 

Selena’s advice to other women who are hesitant to take the plunge into the art of boudoir is simple: “Just do it! Maybe have a glass of wine before you make the decision, if that makes you feel better, but really, just do it! You’re going to look back on this. You’re going to look at your photos and remember this amazing feeling forever.”